Sitting with the Lord and reflecting on a comment a friend made about a picture I posted saying I looked “peaceful.” I responded with the words of an old song,

“This peace that I have, the world didn’t give it and the world can’t take it away.”

We agreed on that! So this morning I spent some time meditating in John 14 focusing on 26-27 verses. When Jesus was comforting his disciples about his pending death. He said, “But the Advocate, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you. Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.”

I wondered how much these words comforted the disciples after witnessing Jesus’ brutal death. Because I’ve dealt with survivor’s guilt on my grief journey. It is a very real part of the journey. Many days wondering why my honey suffered so much. Many days feeling guilty about still being alive and actually feeling joy and peace while still grieving. Questioning if the joy and peace I feel will last or even if it’s real. Being afraid to be too happy after such devastation in case something else happens that takes the wind out of my sail again. It can be a rollercoaster of emotions and thoughts to work and process through. So for my friend to comment that I looked peaceful, knowing the conflicting emotions that I’ve battled with, gave me pause this morning. A pause to be thankful for my journey to healing. Thankful that the peace that I have on the inside is reflected on the outside. Thankful that I can be a messenger of peace just by continuing to live out loud in truth. This peace is an inner life work of the Holy Spirit. This supernatural comfort and peace can’t be attributed to anything or anyone in this world. My life isn’t altogether everyday. But this peace that I have…This world is chaotic and puzzling. But this peace that I have… This grief journey is filled with highs, middles, and lows. But this peace that I have… I still go through pain, disappointments and struggles. But this peace that I have… I have issues and quirks. But this peace that I have… My relationships with others can be complicated sometimes. But this peace that I have… I could go on and on. But this peace that I have…

Come on agree with me, “The world didn’t give it and the world can’t take it away!”

Just sharing my morning musings in hopes that we will take a pause and relish in His peace. This peace that I have…