Sitting with the Lord this morning, reading my husband’s favorite study bible, meditating and listening to the Holy Spirit talk to me about “yielding.” I grew up in the AME ZION church and when someone passes away the church submits a paper to be read at their homegoing services. I remember the paper starting out something like “We humbly yield (submit) to the will of God…” So the Holy Spirit has been helping me slowly wrap my brain around the fact that God brought Stephen home. I would’ve never been ready for him to go if it was left up to me. We would have gone home to the Lord at the same time if it was left up to me. But alas, it wasn’t my decision to make. It is God’s decision and because I trust the Lord with my whole heart then I make the choice to “yield” to God. It is my reasonable service and my responsibility to God to “yield.” Yielding in my grief requires supernatural guidance in my thoughts, my emotions and my body. Yielding redirects my thoughts of distress to thoughts of hope. Yielding redirects my anxious emotions into tears of gratitude for 19 years of marriage to my Love. Yielding redirects my tendencies to isolate and withdraw to Stephen’s admonishment to me to…

“go on and have a good life.”

His way of reminding me that there are still good days ahead. Although I’m getting this revelation of yielding, I realize that this is a process that is unfolding on another level than I’ve ever encountered in my life. I am still not ready to fully grasp what the Holy Spirit is revealing to me at this stage of grief. However, I am thankful for the subtle, gentle reminder that regenerates hope in my spirit. I can yield for this moment and embrace the brief reprieve for now. I receive, Lord, I receive. 

“I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service. And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.”

‭‭Romans‬ ‭12:1-2‬ ‭KJV‬‬